Reflection on Musicals

Yesterday wrapped up the Runaway Stage Productions (RSP) Cinderella musical.

Whenever a performance I'm in ends, I look back and see what I've learned, see if it was worth the time invested for the payout (cash, skill, or enjoyment) received. Reflection like this is beneficial after you've done almost anything in your life. It even works for relationships.

As my friend Jeannie would say, "Is it worth it?" Ask yourself that.

For example, you can ask yourself: Was skydiving your first time worth your money? Scuba diving? Going to Disneyland? Reflection after the event leads to your future participation in life.

It was with RSP's Cinderella that I realized I'm not doing ensemble at a community theatre again. Perhaps ever.

When you're inexperienced with the stage, ensemble is a great opportunity. You get a taste of the rehearsal process, what costumes are like, stage makeup, and what it feels like to perform in front of hundreds. For me, I'm well beyond that point. My first stage shows were early in life before I had the chance to know what 'stage freight' even was, and so it was all pretty simple from there. Except singing, but that's a story for another time.

In Cinderella I met a great guy in this cast and Randy had never danced before, not even at his wedding! He hadn't done stage in a long time, and was learning and growing a lot with RSP and in the ensemble. His dance choreography was the same as mine so it was pushing his limits, I helped out a lot, and it was a great experience for him.

However unfortunate for me, my dance choreography was the same as my new friend Randy's. What pushes and helps one to grow can actually just bore another.

For Cinderella, I looked at my growth in a few ways.

Dance: No growth, nothing pushing my limits.

Music: No solo lines, simple baritone harmonies chosen, no mic, very simple music with few lyrics.. no growth.

Acting: Being a puppeteer but with complete freedom, this acting was just me playing around and doing it my way the whole time. Complete freedom led me to not grow in acting, and it was a completely silent show for me with no lines.

Looking back, I would have grown more if I spent the time with a ballet company and did some of my own choreography and pushed my dancing a little. Or perhaps I joined up with a puppet play for kids with lots of lines and expanded my acting a little. Or just had been taking private vocal lessons this whole time.

It boils down to a lack of growth.

Sadly there wasn't much for me with Cinderella and like all shows at RSP, I was asked to come do the audition for this show so my heart wasn't ever in it to start with. Two months is a lot when you're growing. Two months is asking far too much when you're not growing at all.

Really whenever a guy is asked to join a musical/ballet even if their heart is not in it and they do it to 'help' they sure get mixed up with the people who are there because it's what they actually want to do and people quickly forget about the guy in ensemble who is there just because they needed some men.

I've been in many productions (not at RSP, they're actually quite good) where I was brought in because a guy was needed and then a week later being treated poorly because 'it is a privilege to be in this performance' mindset hits. Sad but true, male dancers are needed in ballet and musicals but rarely treated with the mindset of 'oh this guy is here just to help out and doesn't really want to be here.'

Being the Dove in this show actually saved my sanity. It was fun making things up every night with a puppet in hand to see what worked best, and Chris Cook's puppet was top quality.

End result however is that I am done with ensemble. I need something to grow in to make it worth my time.

CURTAINS

People have asked about my involvement with RSP's next musical, Curtains.

I was asked to come audition at Curtains, so again my heart wasn't there to start, and I gave little effort in order to make room for anyone that was auditioning that actually wanted a part.

One difference with Curtains is that I filled out the 'role auditioning for' portion of my audition card for the first time ever in my life. I filled it out asking for a part with many lines so I could actually act and then checked the box for 'will not accept any other role.'

I was offered a part, and what confused me was it was the role of 'ensemble' which was exactly what I didn't want to have (as outlined above in my experience with RSP's Cinderella).

Regardless, I went to check it out. Fun music, simple choreography yet very aerobic and exciting, really not bad. I was still waiting for clarification on my role due to the fact I was under the naive assumption my request I put on my audition card was being respected. The people were fun, the choreography and music was fun, I didn't know what I was doing there but soon started to care less thinking perhaps I was brought in as 'ensemble' because they needed a good male dancer (some of the people in the show weren't really dancers).

This assumption (and again proof we should NEVER assume) was shattered when a new person was brought in and in one night shown some choreography I'd been doing for a couple weeks and then given parts in dances I was doing.. INTERESTING I thought to myself and brought up my audition card issue to be given back a 'role' with three lines. Almost felt like a slap to the face.

Cinderella introduced me to a few new friends, however sadly I could have spent the two months in various dance communities making friends I wouldn't part with after our last bow and would know and dance with for a long time.

If there is a lesson to be learned from my experience, it is to only seek opportunities that lead you to personal growth in an area, and to never assume.

Oh and also when someone asks you to go audition for something, politely decline. If you wanted to audition, you'd have gotten involved before someone asked. Walking into a show to 'help' only leads to bitterness. Also respect and thank the men that you bring into a ballet or musical.. when I was never thanked for joining a show to help out, it was quite lame.